Be the Leader...

I had the opportunity yesterday to hear Simon Sinek and see him face-to-face.  I had seen his TED talk on "Starting with Why?" but never thought I'd spend more than an hour of my day waiting in line to get a signed copy of his latest book.  Yet, I did stand in line for about 30 minutes to buy the book and then spent another 45 minutes waiting for his signature.  A great benefit of that time was the networking that occurred. 

The woman behind me in the purchase line works with the senior communities of The United Methodist Homes of New Jersey.  Her story was one of losing her long-time job in sales with a manufacturing company, then finding an opportunity with UMHNJ.  She ended her story with "I feel like I'm where I was supposed to be all along."  We talked about how both of our career paths had brought us to the places we now find ourselves and what Sinek had just told us in the general session about leadership not being measured on a daily basis, but only over time.

Standing in the second line with a CEO and board member from a continuing care community of Quaker heritage, I Iistened with great interest as they described how they used consensus and silence, true values of their faith heritage, in their board meetings and decision-making.  Intrigued by their style of governance and wishing that I could experience board leadership of that type, I caught myself reflecting on a statement that Sinek made during his presentation that "We've all sat in meetings and thought, I'll never get this time back."  I've been in way too many church meetings like that.

In front of me was a young man who was representing a construction company that specialized in senior communities.  He described how his grandfather inspired him to move from building office buildings to applying universal design principles in housing for seniors.  He spoke with great passion about this purpose that he had discovered for his life and vocation.  With three copies of the book in his hand, he asked Sinek to dedicate one to him and the two others to members of the team with whom he worked.  I heard him tell Sinek how much he appreciated his comments that leaders are not responsible for the results, but are responsible for the people who make the results.

My night ended in conversation with someone who said she was moved to tears during Sinek's presentation - not because something specific he said touched her, but because she wanted to so badly be in a setting where the type of leadership he described was evident.  "Leaders set the environment. Leaders go first, and make it safe for others to follow." - from Leaders Eat Last, the book I waited so long to have signed.

How different would our churches (and our world) be if we were the types of leaders who strive first to create a safe place for others to share their stories, tell us about their needs, and know that we are fully present in listening to and hearing them?  Of course, leadership can't stop with the listening, but requires commitment and action, often in challenging and demanding ways.  How willing are we to be demonatrate this type of leadership?

Making a Difference

Last Sunday after worship, I received a "thank you" for speaking the truth - the reality as I saw it - during a church meeting last spring. I was also thanked for asking for a time of prayer before a major decision and then offering that prayer at the same meeting.  For fourteen years I encouraged this in lay leadership training classes.  The one time I modeled it in my own church, I'm thanked months later for my courageousness.  I hadn't planned on going to that church meeting. Earlier in the day, however, I received a call from one of those in lay leadership just to talk through some questions. God nudged for the rest of the day, and so I went.  And now, months later, I'm told that my presence made a difference.

Today, while sitting at lunch with an 85+ year old, I listened as he described a 50-year reunion of co-workers that had taken place last Wednesday.  The group had worked together to create, construct, and deploy a satellite that gathered information from space that is still used in weather prediction models.  As he closed his story, he shared that he was so thankful that he could leave this type of legacy.  A second person came to join us who was about the same age.  After hearing stories from his ministry as a pastor, I asked him as the conversation came to an end, to do one thing for me:  pray that I might make a difference in my new work role.  "That I can do," he said.  

The e-newsletter from the Lewis Center for Church Leadership at Wesley Theological Seminary always ends with a section on asking the right questions. Months ago, there was a story about a church leader that asked one particular question before every major decision.  The question was something like this: Will those who come after us shake their heads and say "What were they thinking?" or will they thank us for our leadership?

My prayer for this day:  that we might all leave a legacy, big or small, that others will thank us for, hopefully before we take our last breaths.