As my walk ended and I came to the lamppost at my
sidewalk, I snapped the picture in the banner: the blooming clematis vine
wrapped around a garden flag and an old brick. The climbing vine breaking forth
with new life and stretching in every direction possible, unconcerned about how
I tried to tie it off and make it conform to my expectations. The garden flag that grabbed my heart
immediately when I saw it at a local produce stand because of the goofy blue
bird in its center: a bird so wacky looking that I just had to have it in my
yard to prompt me daily to enjoy life.
The brick that reminds me of my life story, taken from the pile of
rubble after the demolition of a 90 year old building in my hometown which was
destroyed by fire last year.
Joyce’s Drug Store filled part of that building for
many, many years. It was across the
street from the primary school I attended.
When I was young, that store is where I would meet my mother after
school, have a drink or ice cream and possibly buy a comic book, before we
walked home. Sometimes I’d have to wait
a little while in the safety of the drug store before she arrived. In 1968, the school system was finally
integrated, and one day that year when my mom was very late coming to the drug
store, a new male friend who was in my second grade class decided to walk me
home. The house I grew up in was on the
edge of the road that divided the black and white sides of our little
village. Ronnie lived on one side; I
lived on the other. At age 7, we were too young to know the turmoil we might be
creating. As we rounded the curve toward
my house, I remember seeing my mother on the front porch but can’t recall the
look on her face. I do remember Ronnie’s
words: “I’m walking Martha home, Mrs.
Ensley.” I realize now that my journey
of authentic leadership began that day.
What was swirling in my head this morning that
brought all this back and led to starting this blog?
· We
invited a group of friends to our house last Friday night. As the early arrivals gathered at the kitchen
table and began to share a meal, the conversation turned negative when they
realized that one of the guests was an immigrant to the United States from the
Middle East and of Muslim faith. I
couldn’t tolerate the conversation so I walked into another room. For a week
now have tried to deal with my troubled heart for not speaking out and
addressing what was being said. How can I claim to be the advocate for
justice that I believe Jesus calls me to be when I didn’t voice my displeasure
that this conversation was happening in my own house?
· The
extreme introvert that I am, I have been in recovery for two days after
talking for almost 1 ½ hours straight each way between Virginia Beach and Glen
Allen on Wednesday as two of us “old” directors on the Connectional Ministries
staff traveled to Licensing School with three of the interns in our office this
summer. These young adults are
struggling with questions of faith and church life that it took me into my
forties to even think about: How do we live authentic Christian lives? How can
we exclude people when Jesus called us to love everyone? How do we move the
church forward without fear? It pains me
to my core to see the hurt and questioning in their eyes. How do I as a lay leader in The United Methodist
Church encourage holy conversation and action that will transform the lives of
people of all ages and let them see that we truly live what we say we believe?
· I had to
make a very difficult phone call yesterday to share the decision of a board for
which I serve as chair. The call had the
potential to change the professional relationship that I have had with the
individual for 13 years. Upon sharing an
update of the conversation with the other members of the board, I sensed a new
round of great mistrust and anger. How do I lead in ways that build
trust, allowing all the voices to be heard, yet keeps the focus on God’s call
for our individual and corporate ministries above our own desires?
In “Discovering Your Authentic Leadership,” a
February 2007 article for the Harvard Business Review, authors Bill George, Peter Sims, Andrew N. McLean, and Diana Mayer describe a process of research interviews conducted
with 125 leaders identified for their success.
The interviews were based upon
one question: “How can people become and
remain authentic leaders?” In analyzing
the results, the research team found that the leaders did not identify specific
essential leadership characteristics or traits.
It was their life stories that formed the foundation of their success.
“Consciously and subconsciously, they were
constantly testing themselves through real-world experiences and reframing
their life stories to understand who they were at their core. In doing so, they
discovered the purpose of their leadership and learned that being authentic
made them more effective.” (On-line
article: http://hbr.org/2007/02/discovering-your-authentic-leadership/ar/1 )
Robin Sharma, author of The Saint, The Surfer and The CEO:
A Remarkable Story About Living Your Heart’s Desires (2003: Hay House,
Inc.; Carlsbad, CA), states that authentic leadership “is all
about being the person you know in your heart you have always been destined to
be.” (You can find an on-line summary article
of the “Ten Things Authentic Leaders Do” at:
http://leadership.uoregon.edu/resources/exercises_tips/leadership_reflections/10_things_authentic_leaders_do )
So, my
journey of authentic Christian leadership which began the day Ronnie walked me
home will now continue with this blog. By
the way, we all knew by the time we became teenagers that Ronnie was gay. By the early 1980s, he had died from
complications of AIDS. His life
continues to impact my life story.
My prayer is that this blog will impact
the lives of those who are on this journey with me to be the best United
Methodist lay leaders we can be.
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